Day 5 Friday

Still struggling with Jet Lag, those who know me well know I'm not a great sleeper at best of times, but after finishing writing last night at 11pm I made a hot drink, read, listened to a guided meditation on headphones, read some more and was still awake at 1.30am then started to panic because even I were to fall asleep right away that would only give me 4 hours sleep! As it was I did sleep until 4am then laid waiting for the gong at 5.30am, totally exhausted and finally ready to go off into a deep sleep.... But of course I got up like a good girl and walked to the forest hall, past the misty lake, sun not yet up, for meditation group. Sitting for 2 times 20 minutes of silent meditation a break of 5 mins in between for a stretch.... It's not so comfortable otherwise I would of fell asleep! A quick shower then breakfast before community meeting at 8am when, once the gong has been struck, u can speak!

I had a life coaching session at 9am, which was emotional, picture if u will, me with a snotty nose crying a bucket load of "healing" tears.... Oh yes that's the work, it maybe paradise but that comes at a cost, one I choose to pay, far far removed from my comfort zone, so yes tears have been shed, I expected nothing less! After that I wasn't able to face my working meditation which is currently sewing the dozens of cushions in need to repair because of wear and tear and RAT damage! Yes you read that right, they have been taking the filling for their nests, I've yet to see one, but it did see a little frog this morning in the Forest hall, unbeknown to me he'd kept me company during the meditation, as I picked up my coccyx cushion ( with the U shape at the top) he was sitting in the U, I remained calm and restrained and kept my noble silence, poor thing he'd had the pleasure of a v close connection with my bottom for 40 mins!

Oops, there I go, off on a tangent! So no work for me after the blubbing session, I decided to be gentle with myself and come to my room for a rest, I set alarm for an hour and had a nap.... If the alarm hadn't woken me I reckon I could of slept through but I had cushions to sew and then lunch.....

Following lunch there was a goal setting and evaluation workshop, each resident sets SMART( Specific Measurable Achievable Realistic & Timely) goals, this is a standard practice used in business a lot.... You work in groups of 5 to support each other with making the goals and feedback. As it was my first time, I only had to set goals....
Which are:

1. To write for 1 hour a night for blog
2. To be more frivolous, childlike and joyful.

When setting them they seemed like a good idea.... But I'd of preferred to have gone straight to bed after shower tonight, but I couldn't go back on commitment on the first day, so here's no 1....

Number 2 on the other hand is going to be something more of a challenge!!! I've no idea how I can measure it either! And when I say childlike of course I don't mean the cry baby behaviour from earlier following life coach session, I mean just silly innocent giggly fun.... I've spent too long being serious, I feel I am in danger of becoming a dull middle aged woman, when u dear reader know just how funny I can be ( well mildly amusing I hope???) at least on paper (or screen!) it's a confidence thing and something for me to work on, yep there's a long list! (By the way, I promise I'm not fishing for compliments, so please do not feel u need to reassure my bruised ego by saying what a laugh I am! That's not the purpose of sharing this with you)

So they are my goals for this week and I have at least achieved number one for today in a measurable way... Tomorrow, the weekend, a visiting Shaman will be awakening me heart, that's going to take all day Saturday and Sunday... And the blurb promises it's going to be fun, a sing-a-long around the bonfire in the woods to look forward to tomorrow night, many talented musicians here. But will be back here tapping away the next instalment tomorrow night, coz noble silence carries on regardless, 9.30pm all quiet.....

Yawn zzzzzz xxx