Weds 13th Nov

I’ve been googling jetlag; it would probably have been a better idea to do so before I started out on my return journey home. That would have been the sensible thing to do and would have required planning. If these posts have illustrated anything, then it’s clear that is not generally what I do, its not one of my strengths!  According to Google I did everything wrong, especially during the 8+ hours wait for connecting flight at Bangkok Airport. So I guess it isn’t any wonder than I am struggling with insomnia now despite being very tired. I’ve been wide awake since 4am, my bod, still on Asia time feels like it’s 11am...

Back to the Mekong.... Day 2. I smiled to myself as we all (me included) returned to the seats/positions we had occupied the previous day on the boat. Humans generally are creatures of habit! Mr Komsi the lovely guide, advised that it would be a longer day on the river. Concerned about being bored, I had plenty to read, I thought that I would also do some writing. When it came to it I did very little of anything much. While the view was very samey, murky brown water, steep hills/cliffs both sides rising high into fluffy clouds, structures precariously clinging onto the vertical banks, the Magical Mekong put a spell on me which left me in quite a meditative state, it was calming and very much of the moment... Not at all boring....

The sun was bright and hot but the cooling breeze as we sailed along kept the temperature comfortable and pleasant, the boat was mainly covered so we were sheltered from its harsh rays. A section was open to the elements and I did spend a little time away from ‘my table’ enjoying a big helping of Vitamin D. The gentle rocking of the boat, lapping of water against the side and the whirr of the engine was relaxing. I played the soundtrack from the movie Out of Africa on my headphones, and although not in the same continent as Africa, the music (one of my favourites, a view shared I know with Jayne and Carol) provided a perfect accompaniment to this part of my journey. The classical feel of the music always successfully conjures up pictures of magnificent landscapes brightly lit by a golden sun high in the sky.... That music has the power to transport me far away when stuck on the M25 on a grey wet gloomy afternoon.... But no need to be transported anywhere while I was seated on that boat, that image now captured forever in my head; there are no words or camera clever enough to convey that feeling..... Its mine forever stored in my cellular memory bank.

The notion of a feeling, rather than descriptions and details, the names of places together with dates times etc are not my primary interest. That was never the driving force behind this blog.... Goodness knows there are plenty of travel guides/manuals online for research and planning purposes. Why would I ever try to replicate any of that information?  If dear reader, you had hoped to gain some insider knowledge of that sort here then I have surely disappointed you....

During my time at NLF one of the afternoon workshops was around communication. We each worked with a partner and took it in turns to talk for 5 minutes about our most memorable holiday, the other person then shared back what they had learnt. Essentially an exercise in active listening, something we don’t always engage in. Most of us listen while formulating our own response rather than truly hearing what is being said.... (Tangent alert, LOL!) My partner for the exercise was Peter, a guy in his late 50s from California, who has extensively travelled the world for both work and pleasure. He talked about Hawaii, lots of details which were clearly important to him.... Our remit was to listen not question, as he spoke I frantically tried to retain said details.... I didn’t do too badly and he said I remembered most of what he shared. When it was my turn my thoughts went straight to my short break in Dublin a few short weeks before. Devoid of  many ‘details’ I talked about how the trip made me feel, walking around the City, the music, the people, the freedom my motivation for travelling there in the first place. I told a story, I didn’t give a travel report.... Peter had clearly listened, he retold my tale well. When the group came together,  we fed back how the exercise had been and what we had learned from it. I shared the different way that Peter and I had engaged in the activity. Wondering whether it was a Left Brain/Right Brain, Logical/Creative, Feminine/Masculine approach? An interesting debate then ensured with no conclusion other than, thankfully we are all different and have our own way of approaching tasks and life!

I find the memories and information I choose to retain (rather than have to remember) are nearly always connected to the feeling they conjure up within me. Chatting to a friend recently she talked about information she had learned on a dementia awareness course. Her elderly Mother is experiencing difficulties and my friend finds it understandably frustrating and upsetting at times when having spent a ‘nice day’ together,  maybe  a trip to the seaside, lunch out etc her Mum almost immediately ‘forgets’ all about it... My friends ‘efforts’ wasted?  The trainer explained that while a person with dementia may forget the details, they won’t forget the way the experience made them feel....They may not recall exactly why they feel happy and content, the loss of memory doesn’t take away the feelings they are left with... My friend has found that helpful and continues to make the ‘effort’ for her Mum ensuring she helps to cultivate good feelings for her. So what if she doesn’t remember the walk around the garden centre and the cream tea after? My friend remembers the precious time shared and how it made her mum feel and that must be priceless.

Oh my, a huge tangent there! Lol! No I don’t think I have early onset dementia! I have found the information about retaining feelings to be interesting and it has helped me to make sense of the way I see and experience the world.... I am finally, through the wisdom gained from 50 odd years on this planet, being gentle with myself for not having a head full of facts and figures. Apparently emotional intelligence (Ha Ha, if an illustration of me was ever needed; it was my reliance on spell check to even spell the word intelligence!)  Is as important, if not more so as Theoretical/Book type learning! I’m sure I read that somewhere in some self help guide (or on a Facebook Post!)

Well the sun is up in Colchester, I’ve not taken you far along the Mekong River, rather a short but complex journey to my heart... I will return to this, obviously you know I made it back to UK and my next post, written again I’m sure when sleep seems elusive, I’ll share some more of the next stage of my adventure....

I’m going to pop on my trainers and hit the Colchester pavements, before tackling the pile of washing waiting to be unpacked! Have a good day x